Blogging: At It Again

I am feeling the writing itch lately. Especially since Oz is in the military I that blogging will be a great way for me to keep track of what we did and he can review the events that we have been experiencing since he is gone. I was going to create a new blog specifically for him and title it "Daddy Won't Miss A Thing" but I found it simpler just to keep on adding to this blog.

So here is to a new beginning of blogging and keeping a better record of events in my life!

Living in an imperfect world...

Part of me thinks upon the things we knew and thought about before we came to this life. Did we know that we would be living in a time where the government was corrupt and the impact would be watching children suffer? Did we know that values would degrade to such degrees and the people would be accepting? Did we know that people would lose so much self identity to forget who they are? I can imagine that we did and when we did we each stood up with courage saying, "I will go love those lost children. I will go be a light in the darkness. It is going to be hard, and how hard it really will be I do not yet comprehend, but I will go."

Life isn't easy. That is a FACT! What does make life worth it are the people we come in contact with along the way. Hopefully we can live our lives so we can make the journey worth it for others as we are privilege to find others that make it worth ours.

The Race

This is a poem that was shared with me when I was on the mission. It meant a lot to me then and it means a lot to me now. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I do.

Most of the time when I read this poem a missionary or struggling person comes to my mind that would be strengthened if they read this. So, if anyone comes to mind then feel free to share this poem with them. You may never know how much it may mean to them!

Stand up and do something good! You can make the difference!

The Race- By Dr. D. H. Groberg

Whenever I start to hang my head in front of failure’s face,
    my downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.
A children’s race, young boys, young men; how I remember well,
    excitement sure, but also fear, it wasn’t hard to tell.
They all lined up so full of hope, each thought to win that race
    or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
Their parents watched from off the side, each cheering for their son,
    and each boy hoped to show his folks that he would be the one.
The whistle blew and off they flew, like chariots of fire,
    to win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
One boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd,
    was running in the lead and thought “My dad will be so proud.”
But as he speeded down the field and crossed a shallow dip,
    the little boy who thought he’d win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch himself, his arms flew everyplace,
    and midst the laughter of the crowd he fell flat on his face.
As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn’t win it now.
    Humiliated, he just wished to disappear somehow.
But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
    which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”
He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a bit that’s all,
    and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win,
    his mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.
He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace.
    “I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.”
But through the laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face
    with a steady look that said again, “Get up and win that race!”
So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind the last.
    “If I’m to gain those yards,” he thought, “I’ve got to run real fast!”
Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight, then ten...
    but trying hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.
Defeat! He lay there silently. A tear dropped from his eye.
    “There’s no sense running anymore! Three strikes I’m out! Why try?
I’ve lost, so what’s the use?” he thought. “I’ll live with my disgrace.”
    But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.
“Get up,” an echo sounded low, “you haven’t lost at all,
    for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
Get up!” the echo urged him on, “Get up and take your place!
    You were not meant for failure here! Get up and win that race!”
So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to forfeit,
    and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.
So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been,
    still he gave it all he had and ran like he could win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he rose again.
    Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.
They cheered another boy who crossed the line and won first place,
    head high and proud and happy -- no falling, no disgrace.
But, when the fallen youngster crossed the line, in last place,
    the crowd gave him a greater cheer for finishing the race.
And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud,
    you would have thought he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”
    “To me, you won,” his father said. “You rose each time you fell.”
And now when things seem dark and bleak and difficult to face,
    the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
    And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
And when depression and despair shout loudly in my face,
    another voice within me says, “Get up and win that race!”

All it takes for Satan to win is that a good man does nothing!!!

From personal experience Satan is waging an all out war on all righteous people of the world. He doesn't need to keep on focusing on those who are already making bad choices and following his desires because he already has them. Those people are not enough for him to be content making their life miserable, he wants the good and righteous children of God. There has been a significant increase in suicide rates and people struggling with self doubt and personal direction. He is attacking and he knows he can't get most people by getting them to do something by an outside influence but he takes down the best from the inside out. If he can get us to doubt ourselves or leave room in our lives for fear than he can start taking us down. All it takes for Satan to win is that a good man does nothing paralyzing fear is a real thing and many people experience it for various reasons yet one of the most common and deep painful fear is when someone fears being insignificant. When someone doesn't understand that they have a purpose, are loved, have direction then it is hard to see past the fog of Satan's deceptions and ones vulnerability is increased ten fold.

We cannot let him win! Do not give up! We cannot give up!!! We win as long as we don't quit on this life, every single time we say an extra prayer when it seems to be the hardest to do we are doing much better then we think.

AND YOU ARE NOT ALONE IN THIS! You are fighting along side the best that there is. People don't usually talk about their internal personal struggles openly but trust me they have them, they are real, and you are understood by more people than you know. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

This all is pouring out of me as a result of me texting a friend tonight that I honestly haven't talked to in weeks. I felt to text him and tell him how great I think he is and to say hi. He texted back with a heavy heart and concern for his life. His struggles are real and so are so many others that are struggling. Satan is working hard on my friend because he has such eternal value and so does each and every one of us! Satan is fighting hard to take down the good and we must stand together to not let him win! You may be able to be that person that can offer an extra hug, say a kind word, or reach out and save someones life. You may never know when you may be that person in need so be the friend that everyone deserves and loves instead of judge and lift instead of criticize! 

Keep on going friends! Don't give up!!!

I am so grateful for the wonderful example of my Grandma and Grandpa Jones. This is a quote that they have hanging on their wall and their lives have truly reflected that they believe the importance of these words!

If you by chance are struggling at this time and experiencing similar things then something that can be useful is Elder Bednars talk from the last general conference "Therefore They Hushed Their Fears" https://www.lds.org/general-conference/2015/04/therefore-they-hushed-their-fears?lang=eng In any case it is an incredible talk and I would suggest reading or listening to it!

Magical Moments

Family traditions are something that I have missed being a part of over these last few years of being a young single adult and being away from family. Between serving a mission, traveling to visit loved one it just hasn't been the same without young children being a part of the experience. Since being in Portland I have experienced the value of tradition with small feet running around and joyous giggles celebrating with Christmas cheer.

Each morning the first thing the little ones do when they wake up is look for the elf on the shelf that they named "Tink". They know the rules of no touching and are completely dedicated to being good because they want Tink to tell Santa all good things when he returns to report. Also, each day there is a count down to Christmas chain and an activity is written on it for each day. Today was to have a Christmas dance party. Along with the count down chain is Grandma and Grandpa Jones cousins count down to Christmas advent calendar. We're always excited to see who is next! Then with the fun activities of the day and spending time with the family there is a gift that is opened each night. It is a Christmas book that is read out loud to the children around the Christmas tree.

Tonight as things were settling down, after the Christmas dance party, Derek was reading a Christmas book to the kids around the Christmas tree. Luke (the 2 year old) wasn't as easily entertained. He has an eye for noticing anything going on that is exciting around him and if there is a train within sight at any point of the day. He looked out the window and noticed a glowing cho cho train drive by. At first he was the only one to see it and the boy was glued to the window with his jaw dropped and eyes wide open. I wanted to see what had this active 2 year old so captivated. To my surprise I saw the train go by, then a tractor driven by Mrs. Clause, then a lit wagon driven by Santa Clause himself. Wow that was enough for me, I knew everyone else had to see this. I started yelling for everyone to quick come and look. I must be easily excitable because at first no one but the children took me seriously. Once they made it to the window and were excited then the adults got interested and saw how incredible this really was. Quickly we each picked up the smallest child in our reach and took of running. We had to see more of this! It was a Christmas parade driving through our very own neighborhood filled with fire trucks, tractors, wagons, trucks, cars, and more that were each filled with a creative variety of Christmas lights and Santa Clause decor. We ran around the neighborhood several times, most of us in our bare feet, so the children would get the full experience of this Christmas surprise. The joy of these children were full with smiles on their faces, mouths open, and wide eyed in wonder at how lucky they were that Santa Clause came to their very own neighborhood in preparation for Christmas. It truly was a magical moment! These must be the luckiest kids in the world!

Tiz The Reason For The Season!

Sitting around the room, family all spread out, my heart is full as I reflect on this past year. There hasn't been one day that I haven't had to worry about having a roof over my head or bed to rest. How blessed I feel. I recognize that during this Christmas season some people experience the Holidays with different traditions and receiving various gifts. Yet sometimes there are those that have nothing to give and nothing to be received. What a sad place to be, yet how humbled I am to recognize how easy it could be for any single person to be in that position. As I recognize this my understanding of my dependence for my blessings on my Savior. His birth truly is an event to be celebrated.

If there are those that feel that they are in a position to not give of worldly means, or even in a position that you will not be receiving of them, then it is time to step outside yourself. Some of the best and most important gifts that are given are those of a listening ear and comforting a sadden heart. When you feel that you are in a position to not receive as you step outside yourself and give then that is the greatest gift you can receive. I am one that believes it blesses you more then those that receive.

As we remember Christ and think of more ways that we can become more like him then our lives will truly be filled. I am continually inspired and touched by  those that reach out and do kind things for me and those that are around me. It are in those moments that I am able to see a small reflection of Christ in others, and thus for a moment I feel that much closer to him and remember that he is not that far away.

It Isn't About Me Anyways

I am so grateful for each opportunity that I have to serve others. This weekend I have had the opportunity to serve many in unique ways. For the most part it has come in the form of listening but in others it has been in the form of humbling myself enough to focus on others more then me (and yes that is a form of service because it sometimes takes concentrated effort). For example. I am going to teach the Relief Society lesson today. Through out the week I would remember that I needed to teach and prepare but I kept on remembering and forgetting because it was easier for me to put it off because the topic overwhelmed me. Well I put it off until Saturday and my heart was crushed because on Saturday morning I found out that someone that is very near and dear to my heart had gotten a divorce.I was a lot more devastated over it then I expected to be. As a result preparing the lesson for relief society and the topic of eternal marriage hurt my heart because this couple was married and sealed in the temple. Throughout the day and the preparations I kept being blessed with tender mercies along the way. The right people would visit or call to help me get perspective. Then today before church I was able to do my visiting teaching with my visiting teaching companion. As I prayed in preparation for the lesson a very specific scripture and thought came to my mind. I didn't think much of it but I was grateful and went on with my preparations. At the lesson my companion started out and then I tied in what I had gained and felt I should share. I wrapped the lesson up and hadn't payed much attention to what was going on around me. I went to let my companion say something at the end and she couldn't speak. I looked at her and through her tears all she could say is "thank you, that is what I needed to hear". Those are the types of moments we live for. When we try to do what is right and do what the Lord would have us do, it is then that we are able to speak his words and touch peoples hearts.

This is a lot of detail for me to get to the end result of what I learned. I learned while preparing this relief society lesson that the Lord is aware of the needs of these sisters that I will have the opportunity to teach as much as he is aware of mine. This lesson isn't about what I need to learn and gain it is what I have to give. I truly know the Lord is strengthening me and blessing me in the process but I have had experiences that have strengthened me on the path to eternal marriage that I need to share because these sisters can be strengthen by them and find their own path of hope that I have so graciously found through the atonement of our Savoir. Thus in the end sometimes I think I get lost in thinking of how services can be challenging for me but in the end it isn't about me anyways. It is what the Lord has given me to share with others and in the process he will heal and strengthen me in the ways that he needs me to grow. Wow, what a miracle and blessing the gospel is! He truly does work in mysterious ways and I know with all my heart that it is the path that leads to true happiness in this life and in the life to come! Mosiah 24:14